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HELICOPTER PARENTS
Over protecting parents who continually hover over their children
Most decent parents are, understandably, prone to protect their children from threats and teach them about danger, while helicopter parents want to protect their children from harm, hurt and pain, from unhappiness, bad experiences and rejection, from failure and disappointments.
What Is Overprotective Parenting?
• Sheltering
• Constant supervision and micromanagement
• Prevention of taking responsibility
• Excessive catering and over-consoling
• Controlling of the social sphere
• Excessive caution
• Creating dependency
Oftentimes, overprotective parents believe that they are doing the best thing for their children trying to always be involved in every aspect of that child's life, not just in a supportive way, but in a controlling way.
Overprotective Parenting Style
• Comforting a child shortly after a simple fall that produces no distress.
• Strict rules that do not allow a child to get dirty or creative.
• Punishment that does not fit the crime. Discipline is overly harsh for minor offenses.
• Over-emphasis on being successful in school.
• Rely heavily on a system of rewards and punishments.
The greatest drawback of the overprotective parenting style is underprepared children. Parents in this category are fearful of everything when it comes to their children.
According to leadership expert Tim Elmore, when we rescue too quickly and overindulge our children with “assistance,” we remove the need for them to solve problems on their own and prohibit them from becoming competent adults.
THE NEGATIVE SIDE EFFECTS TO OVERPROTECTIVE PARENTING
• Lies
Overprotective parenting will frequently encourage a child to lie. When expectations are too high or unreasonable, a child will lie to avoid getting in trouble.
• Manipulation
Kids get a reward/punishment system for their behavior and can grow up to be adults who are materialistic and manipulative. They don’t do the right thing just because it is the right thing to do.
• Aggression and Rebellion
When a child has spent his entire life being guarded against risk, most likely, his way of rebelling against his parents will be translated through engaging in potentially dangerous behavior and taking large gambles with physical, mental or monetary safety.
• Self-Esteem and Self-Confidence
Over-protective parents can protect a child to the point where he never learns surmounting challenges on his own, doubting his own capacity by fear of failure.
• Self-Discipline and Responsibility
A parent who schedules all of a child’s free time doesn’t allow the child to develop the self-discipline necessary to stay positively busy in an independent way.
• Over-Dependence
The strict parent unintentionally creates a situation where the child becomes excessively dependent on parents thus he may not be able to think independently and make decisions apart from parental input and advice.
• Higher Risk of Anxiety Disorders
Anxious parents tend to produce anxious kids, because they demonstrate that the proper way to react to situations is through fear, worry and withdrawal.
• Higher Odds of Being Bullied
Psychologist Lisa J. Cohen explains, "Overprotective parents actually increase their child's risk of being targeted by bullies by hampering their independence and self-confidence and enhancing their sense of passivity and dependency."
Credit: Wehavekids, selfgrowth, Cornell University Cooperative Extension, living.thebump, Michigan State University Extension, bustle.
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